Brilliant dad feature week 66
This week our brilliant dad feature is David from the UK. He is a 36 year old dad of two beautiful, but crazy critters (Jesse, aged 2 and Amelie, just 6 months). His plus one, partner in crime and love of his life in all of this is Natalie. They have been together for 20 years this year (yes, they were school yard sweethearts), and he says after what seemed life a world record attempt engagement length, they finally married in 2012.
He is a English teacher and his wife is a Social Worker working in Children’s Services. So yes, with that classic combination, their critters are bound to rebel and become outlaws or delinquents…it’s almost guaranteed.
They love nothing more than family time and can often be found exploring the great outdoors, camping in their beautiful bell tent, kicking back in the sun (and sometimes monsoon-type weather) at music festivals, and enjoying the sights and sounds of city breaks and travels abroad. David blogs at Potty Adventures.
Thank you to David for taking part!
1. Have you always wanted to be a dad?
Yes. Although I was the only child in a single mother household, Nat comes from a huge family, and I mean huge! Therefore, as we’ve been together since we were teenagers we’ve always been surrounded by lots of kids so it seemed like a natural progression for us. As younger adults though we planned to put it off as long as possible as we wanted to travel and see lots of the world together first. Unfortunately, what we didn’t consider is that when we finally decided that the time was right we would have lots of problems conceiving (anyway that’s a future post in itself). So after a long, often heartbreaking journey we were finally rewarded with what we’d always wanted.
2. How did you feel when your children were born?
A sense of joy unrivalled. After the long build up of pregnancy where you feel every emotion under the sun, when the moment of arrival – the meet and greet if you will – finally occurs everything is washed away in milliseconds. That soon turned into sheer panic and a level of gut-wrenching fear during Jesse’s birth as both he and Nat had some complications which left me in a state of utter distress inside while trying to stay stoic on the surface. Fortunately, however they were both fine and I then proceeded to cry uncontrollably for quite some time. On Amelie’s arrival I felt much calmer – all of the worries about can I do this? What do you actually have to do? etc. were gone. I was again struck by the same state of happiness and joy (which guiltily I thought I’d never be able to match after having Jesse) and, in that one moment, my love capacity doubled. I quickly learned that love isn’t something that is shared or divided up. It’s total and all consuming in an instant where your kids are concerned.
3. What have been your most rewarding experiances so far as a dad?
Wow! This is a tough one because there are so many. I’m going to have to say I genuinely can’t pick one out as the single most rewarding. From big things like sharing our love of music and the outdoors with Jesse clapping along to a band I love while perched on my shoulders at his first music festival, to simply that smile they give me first thing in the morning. Everything, in its own way is rewarding. Apart from nappies that is. They are the work of the devil! The only thing I’d add is that I suppose you worry prior to having kids that your life will change to such an extent that you’ll no longer be able to enjoy the things that drew you together in the first place. This is completely wrong. You just adapt to do them in a more inclusive manner. And in doing so they become even more rewarding.
4. What are some of the funniest moments to have happened to you as a dad so far?
Again, there are so many. For quite an intelligent guy I am dozy and have picked Jesse up from nursery a few times, walked him to the car only to discover I’ve forgotten the car seat. Once would considered a genuine error. Having to take him back in and explain to the nursery staff on several occasions that I’ll be back again shortly is just silly. There are also the obvious covered in poo or sick stories and a time when Jesse insisted on wearing Mr Potato Head’s tiny plastic glasses which had me in stitches and made us both look utterly crazy.
The final one that springs to mind was at the music festival when myself and the other dad in our group were given Saturday night ‘off’ by our loving wives to consume our body weight in alcohol. However, as Jesse was asleep in his wagon after the final bands had finished I insisted on helping Nat by pulling the wagon back to the tent in the dark. After several comments of how well I was managing said task we got back to the tent without even the slightest wobble or loss of direction. I think I’d concentrated so hard I’d almost given myself a headache. Anyway, the moment we arrived back I announced that I just needed a quick visit to the toilet. So after all of that concentrating I had clearly relaxed into my alcohol stupor, took literally four steps in the direction of the toilets and fell face first into somebody’s tent, much to the amusement of everyone who’d just congratulated me on such a stellar job of navigating the festival wagon home. I stood up to the various campsite cries of ‘you fell over’ from strangers revelling in my failure.
5. Have there been any situations with your children that you have found difficult to cope with?
Not as of yet. But then again they are both very young so they’re probably storing all of these up for the future.
6. What are dreams and hopes for your children?
To be happy, plain and simple. As long as it’s law abiding and morally conscionable I want them to follow their dreams and ambitions not mine.
2 Comments
Cardiff Mummy Says
June 9, 2016 at 8:17 pm
I really enjoy this series, Nigel. It's so lovely to get a dad's point of view on experiences of parenting. How lovely they are high school, sweet hearts!
Nigel
June 9, 2016 at 9:28 pm
Thank you Cathryn when I started this feature never thought it would go on so long and I plenty more to come I love reading them as they are so different to the same questions