Brilliant dad feature week 58

I never imagined a time when growing up that I wouldn’t be a dad. Allthough it was never a burning ambition, but I always expected to be a dad. In my mind it would be when I was young in my early 20’s or when I was in my late 30’s /early 40’s.

Coming from a family where my mum and dad were 35 and 45 respectively when they had me ,and seeing how tired they were as I grew up when I met and fell in love with my now ex-wife, having kids was always something that was going to happen sooner rather than later. I first became a dad aged 22. 

2. How did you feel when your children were born?

Very elated, but also responsible. Each birth was a reminder that I had a huge weight of additional responsibility too, and these were the two abiding emotions that I still remember to this day.

3. What have been your most rewarding experiances so far as a dad?

The personal acheivements of not having killed any of them for one (I say that only slightly tongue in cheek), but I think I’m more proud of just how great my kids are. There is only 18 and 26 months between and that has formed a close relationship. They have experianced the pain and anguish of their parents divorcing and the baggage that comes along with a split home, but yet remain the nicest natured kids I could imagine.

4. What are some of the funniest moments to have happened to you as a dad?

If you’ve got kids, you know that there is always a funny moment just around the corner. Whether it’s the panic when you can’t figure out why your two year old is pooing lime green poo, before you suddenly realise that the same coloured crayons are missing from the pack and on closer inspection there are remnants of the same crayons in the teeth of the said pooer. That’s also the day we found out that crayons are non-toxic by the way.

There’s also the non-funny moments that you can laugh about at some stage months after an event has happened. One such moment was when my son broke his elbow when he was only a year old. We rushed him to the hospital and he was taken into the X-Ray room where a nurse asked me his date of birth,in my panic I gave his sisters date of birth, which after a few seconds, when I realised my error,it made feel like a real failure of a father. A toddler with a broken elbow and father that can’t remember his date of birth.

5. Have there been any situations with your children that you have found difficult to cope with? 

Yes, lots! The main one that I still struggle with to this day is sibling rivalry. I grew up as an only child,as did their mum. Neither of us have first hand experiance if what is considered “normal” brother and sister behaviour. The fights that go on sometimes scare the the life out of me! Whenever I talk to friends they all tell me it’s perfectly normal. It still confuses me to this day.

6. What are your dreams and hopes for your children? 

I’ve thought about this for years. I’d love them to do the things that I never got a Chance to do. I want them to experiance life, to be successful,to know what it’s like to love and be loved. But it doesn’t matter what my hopes for them are. They are their own people. They will choose their own path in life, and all I hope for me is that I’m sensible enough to let them do it, and to be there for them when they succeed and when they fail ,as they will all experiance both as they go though life. I quess,in short, what I hope and dream of for my children is for them to be happy. That’s all.