I'm my wife's bitch!!

I sit there either flicking through the TV channels or blogging, but I also have another very important job every evening which is being my wife’s bitch. 

My job starts for approximately three hours. It’s hard and difficult and I am constantly kept on the go. 

Here’s how it goes:

1. My wife only has to hear the kettle being lifted and I hear, cup of tea please!

2. I’m hungry what can I eat? Then standing there waiting for her to decide

3. Sometimes all I hear is the word chocolate!

4. Glass of squash please!

5. My legs need massaging and it has to be in a particular area behind the knee and then orders me to do different parts of her legs 

6. My feet need massaging 

7. Can you get my Apple Mac. This is a long and arduous walk to the bedroom. 

8. I could really eat toast now, best I make it then!

9. Can you do my klout thread!

10. She thinks there is a petrol fairy. No, wait, that’s me, the petrol bitch, who fills her car up when it’s empty!

All the time she doesn’t move from her place of hibernation, buried under her dressing gown and blanket on the sofa. Hell, I wouldn’t mind, but I’m on minimum wage, no holidays and on call 24/7. I am getting better at my job,because I am beginning to anticipate what my wife wants next. 

Of course I am only joking and certainly don’t mind doing anything for my wife and hey if that means being her bitch I want the job badly! If I could walk on water I would for her, but no I can’t I would drown thinking about it! And then who would be her bitch. 

This post has been verified as all true yes you guess it by My Wife! 

O shut up!