I have often wondered if we teach our children the desire and will to win at sports or academic achievements. Or it is something that we are born to do? Is it part of our character and DNA?
Looking back at my own childhood I was never encouraged, let alone taught to be first in whatever I did. In fact I wasnt even taught that taking part was the most important thing. All that aside I always wanted to be first and I hated losing. I wouldn’t entertain coming second! Is that wrong? Well, I don’t think so. It’s helped me along all my life. Whether that was in school or eventually in the workplace.
In today’s world it’s very different. Our children see the big sport stars earning mega bucks and in truth it’s giving out the wrong message, that we can all do that, but we can’t. Only a tiny percentage achieve fame and riches.
So is it right to encourage our children to win at all costs? Of course it’s not PC, but what do we do teach them? That taking part is the most important part? To be a team player? Of course many people would like us to do that, but unfortunately that’s not me. I want my children to win and I believe if parents are honest they all want their children to win.
We all most likely knew somebody in school that was good, in fact excellent at any sport they tried and quite often they were also academically brilliant. There was always one in the school. I will add that none of my children were those kids in school that could do everything, although it’s early days for the twins at just four years old!
The other week we went to the Halloween school disco and the girls were involved in a game of musical bumps. They are still a little bit shy so I sat on the floor near them and found myself waiting for the music to stop and quickly telling them to sit down. I turned around and my wife was smiling and just said you are so competitive! I’m not going to excuse myself because I am competitive and if you want anything in life you have to be, I believe.
With my older children I have always taught them to be competitive and to win. I don’t think it has hurt them in any way whatsoever, but the desire does have to be there, and that has to be something you are born with I believe, and I also think that everyone has that ability and if possible, it needs to be nurtured, and developed into a winning mentality.
Do you teach your children to be competitive and always try to win, or do you teach them to just take part? Would love to know what you think!