Old Age Doesn’t Come Alone (My Mum)

My mum has recently been in hospital for quite a lengthy stay and in fact at the time of writing this she has been in hospital for 18 days with no sign at the moment of her being discharged.

Sixteen days ago on a Monday teatime I got a call from the alarm people that my mum is linked too to tell me my mum had fallen, this was actually the second fall for her in three days.

On arriving and letting myself in I found my mum sitting on the bedroom floor and what struck me initially was the large amount of blood on the carpet.

My mum had her back to me, so I was very nervous to what to expect. When I looked at her she was crying and very emotional. When I saw my mum’s face it was as if she had gone through a few rounds of boxing and lost.

I immediately phoned an ambulance as I realised a number of injuries could have taken place and by moving her I could have caused more damage. She was complaining of back pain and a lot of pain in her arm.

The ambulance arrived quickly and paramedics did their job and got her off to hospital for treatment however, mum was always vain and refused to wear a hearing aid. Had she have worn a hearing aid such as Oticon hearing aids she would have been able to better understand the steps that the paramedics were taking and that they were taking her to hospital. She didn’t wear a hearing aid, so I had to translate everything to hear which was quite difficult in an already stressful situation.

Once I arrived at the hospital I was shocked to see my mum as she was still bleeding quite heavily from her face and was really out of it. I stayed a while and waited for some results to come back and they were not good.

She had numerous little fractures to her cheekbones and nose. A fractured bone in her arm, and fracture to her lower back, and a lot of heavy bruising to her neck. A lot of injuries from a fall in her bedroom.

My mum then spent two days on a ward near the A & E department, not a pleasant place as it’s cramped and very busy, although I will say the one nurse looking after her was amazing.

Finally she was moved to a short surgical stay ward elsewhere in the hospital, with the intention of getting her mobile and back on her feet.

The physiotherapist visited daily and she was encouraged to start walking around the ward.

It’s terrible to watch one of your parents who up to a certain age was so full of life become totally dependent on those around her.

It has been an awful transition for her, as she is now totally housebound, unless we take her out she couldn’t possibly do it on her own. In a strange sort of way it’s like gaining another child.

Although I have over the years had moments of falling out with my mum I have always made my peace. I have written many times that my childhood was tainted in not good ways by some of my mums actions, but for all of that she is my mum and you only get one and not in a hurry to lose her.

People are living longer than ever nowadays which is a great thing as long as they have a good quality of life. Does my mother have a good quality of life? If I’m honest I don’t think so.

One big problem my mum has suffered from in her later years is not hearing properly. For a long time this has been dismissed by her as not a problem, but after a long chat with her I believe she has a build up of ear wax.

I often thought she was a rarity in falling over and sometimes I didn’t have the patience I should have, but my feelings have changed since visiting my mum for 18 days. There seemed to be a never ending stream of elderly people coming to hospital because of a fall.

Of course another option could be for my mum to consider a care home where there is a 24/7 care. To help with problems she may have.

My mum is finally back at home and we have a carer and physiotherapist package in place which will last six weeks and of course we as a family will rally around to do whatever is required to help.

Mum is on the mend and this will take time, old age doesn’t come alone and my goodness you wouldn’t want to do it twice!

We should really think about our elderly relatives, whether they are mums or dads or grandparents, sometimes a phone call or just a 10 minute visit will help them know they are not alone and most likely really make their day.

Would love to know your thoughts