Brilliant dad feature week 73
This week our brilliant dad feature is Dave. He is from and living in London. He normally works on trying to get our electricity transmission networks ready for the future, but since the beginning of June he is looking after his first baby, the Little Bear, full time. He has been sharing parenting with his wife since their Little Bear was born in January, and he has just started his half of parental leave to be the primary carer until the end of the year. His wife is Swedish, which makes the Little Bear (or Lilla Björn!) Swedish and English, so they are planning on bringing him up bilingual.
He blogs at Pappa’s Turn about his experiences as a dad, who’s sharing parenting with his wife. He is now 5 months old now and it’s Dave’s time on parental leave.
Thank you for Dave for taking part.
1. Have you always wanted to be a dad?
For as long as I can remember. I loved helping bring up my little sister, and always wanted kids.
2. How did you feel when your children were born?
We were lucky to have a ‘medically uncomplicated birth’ (I’m not going to call it easy), but it was still long, and my mental state when he finally popped out was a bit mixed:
Exhausted: But also weirdly wired at the same time, and not just from sneaking some of the gas and air.
Terrified: I might break this fragile little person someone just handed me. He was like jelly and despite having held countless babies before, this felt so much more terrifying.
Resigned: I thought we might have some difficult few years. After I was given him, he started crying, and despite me bounding him and singing to him, he didn’t stop for what seemed like half an hour.
But it was also impossible to get the smile off my face. I was on a serious sleep-deprivation and fuzzy-feeling induced high.
3. What have been your most rewarding experiences so far as a Dad?
First smile, first giggle. The excitement I got from him when arriving home from work each day, or by saying ‘good morning’ to him when he wakes me up at 5.30am by singing to himself. The first time he rolled over himself, and the first time he squeezed me in a real hug. It’s been great seeing his little personality start to come through. The list is quite long and difficult to choose from.
4. What are some of funniest moments to have happened to you as a dad?
We’ve only had a few months with him, but he’s still made us laugh a lot. Let’s put aside the painful moment when he kicked my square in the balls yesterday and laughed hysterically (less funny for me).
His shear joy at climbing up your belly to your face results in him grabbing hold of your face, and screeching loudly in your ear. Like a little victory cry. Whilst painful for the parent he’s attacking, it’s funny for the person watching.
Moments before his tongue-tie operation he decided to have his first poo-explosion. As new parents we were not prepared! Changing him in the hospital became all the more complicated by him getting more and more excited and waving his limbs around… into the poo.
He cottoned on that his family were laughing at his tinny hiccups, so when the hiccups stopped, he took it upon himself to take little sharp breaths in and wobble his body, followed by a little squeak. Yes, he was faking hiccups to get us to laugh. He still does this (more being a little genius that a comic though).
I’m pretty sure the older he gets, the funnier he’ll become.
5. Have there been any situations with your children that you have found difficult to cope with?
The first few weeks were really tough for all of us. I think expectant parents should really be aware of just how tough those first few weeks can get compared to pre-baby life. It’s a real shock to the system that nothing can prepare you for. After that, challenges such getting him to sleep, coping with a tantrum, and getting him to sleep in the middle of a tantrum, all seem very manageable.
6. What are your dreams and hopes for your children?
That he becomes a Nobel Prize winner, I’m not fussed which category… No, just that he has a career he finds rewarding and a partner he loves and loves him back. I want him to get old and feel he’s lived a good life.
