I imagine a lot of us share our beds with our small children or babies on a regular basis. I know in our home we do! There aren’t many nights that go by when I’m not sharing a bed with three females. Wait a minute! That is four year old twins and my wife before your minds go into overdrive!
I don’t feel unusual because it is going on in many homes around the world, but unfortunately due to what I call parenting ‘one up-manship’ you can feel that you are the only one because what’s one of the most common parent phrases that I have heard a million times, and I’m sure you have heard it too. My child goes to sleep at 7pm and we don’t hear a peep out of them till 7am, sometimes later. YES. YES. YES ! Really? I don’t think so.
I’m very used to it now, but the twins will be turning five in February and the time is really coming where we need to make sure they start sleeping all night in their own beds, but after four and half years I’m clueless to how we achieve that.
It’s become the norm for the girls to find their way to our bedroom in the middle of the night and jump into bed and if I’m honest I sometimes don’t even wake up. Then in the morning I find them on either side of me, squashing me.
We could of course play the tough parent card. When they were babies, I’m not sure that was an option. We had twins, we needed sleep and we would do anything to sleep. It was the single most important pursuit in life and it was to get us through another day.
Apparently I have read that research has said that it’s not a bad thing and in fact co-sleeping can have massive beneficial effects on their lives, development and growth. The truth is I’m not bothered if it helps them feel secure and happy. What is actually wrong with it? Let’s be honest with ourselves they will be teenagers with hormones and for a while we will struggle to get a conversation.
So now I have come to the conclusion that as long as we manage to get them to sleep in their own beds in the the next 12 months for at least some of the week I will think we are doing a good job. Of course how we are going to do that I have no idea because this has been going on for over four years, haha!
Would love to know if you co-sleep or have you played the tough parent from when they were babies and now your children sleep all night in their own beds?
3 Comments
Nick Harrison
December 19, 2016 at 6:35 pm
Currently my four-year-old comes in every night and neither my wife or I wake up. We are woken though when my one-year-old wakes up and I take him into the bed recently vacated by his older brother. Only my wife wakes up in the bed she fell asleep in. Sometimes I wonder if we should knock all the walls of the bedrooms down and all sleep in one giant bed! 😉
John Adams
December 21, 2016 at 6:30 am
Ha ha, good luck with that Nigel! Having twins probably makes co-sleeping more likely and more of a challenge. I have to be careful how I present this, but we never encouraged it. We just felt that our bed should be our space. Everyone has a different approach, no oine is right or wrong, but, yeah, do let us know how you get on in a year’s time!
Bear and Cardigan
December 22, 2016 at 6:10 pm
I love this photo. I think each to their own and I have no problem with co sleeping, we did with our first as a new baby and I am sure it would have continued but I found that they would take all the bed and I couldn’t sleep! Elbows and knees digging in everywhere and they would lie diagonally too.
Mine did sleep through the night, honest they really did, but would come into our bed when they needed us, aching legs that needed rubbing or cuddles after a nightmare. They were always welcomed but we would return them to their own beds so we could sleep.
At your twins age I would talk to them about it, that they are getting too big to all fit in the bed and they need to sleep in their beds, that they can share with each other if they want too. Gently, gently and they will soon prefer their own beds. I’m also a great believer in if it isn’t broke don’t fix it! Good luck xx