My Little Superhero and Princess 

I wrote a post in March last year called Superhero v Princess. The post was all about my five year old twin girls and although there is only two minutes between them being born they really couldn’t be more different in their likes and dislikes.

I have wondered for a long time whether it’s nurture or nature and I come to the conclusion that it really has to be nature. Neither my wife nor I are passionate about superheroes or princesses so they couldn’t possibly have been influenced by us.

The girls have just turned five years old and after their party we came home and sorted out the many gifts they had received for them to open. The girls started to open them and R opened this particular one and it was a my little pony doll. Her response was amazing. She said I don’t like them and then said to her sister do you want it and just gave it to her. Of course M gratefully accepted it. I imagine she thought WIN WIN !

The girls also had some money given to them early by a family friend and that afternoon we had to go Asda’s to buy their birthday cakes. This also showed their differences again as R picked a Star Wars cake and M picked a Shopkins one. We also said they could spend their money that they had been given and buy what they wanted,  dangerous! I know they could pick anything! OMG ! What are they going pick?

We were hoping they were going to pick something sensible, but still never mind we had given them free rein. We went to the clothing department and M is obsessed with Moana, so when she saw a Moana costume it was off the shelf in a split second! M had decided very quickly and was totally happy with her choice.

Both the girls love the film Moana, but again without question, as I have already said M is obsessed with Moana, but R’s favourite is Maui. For their birthday their oldest sister brought them toy dolls from Disney of Maui and Moana and they now sleep every night with them. Infact the girls quite often end up in our bed and I found myself cuddled up to Maui one night because R had brought him into our bed, haha! This again shows how toys should never be gender based because girls are allowed to like all toys.

I also spoke to my eldest daughter about this, and she said the shop assistant asked who are they for. So she explained they were birthday presents for her five year old sisters and the shop assistant gave a look of why would a girl want Maui, because why can’t girls prefer Maui to Moana and she felt she was justifying herself. This is so wrong on every level. I really expected a better attitude from a Disney employee. This goes shows that people’s attitude needs changing.

R was looking around and I pointed out a few things that she may have liked in Asda’s, who have typical stereotypical aisles of boys and girls clothes. I knew all along that we would have to gravitate towards the boys aisle. This annoys me. R started looking and found a Batman Lego t-shirt and instantly loved it. Why for goodness sake is this only in the boys section? Correct me if I’m wrong, but first of all I thought Lego was a toy for either gender and here we are again in Asda’s who are saying Batman is a boys only character. What total and utter nonsense!

When are retailers going to realise that girls like Superheroes too! I was disgusted yet again because R shouldn’t have to look in the boys section. It should have been in a mixed section, but of course that would be too much trouble for retailers to do.

The other most noticeable likes and dislikes they have are shown so perfectly in this photo on the morning of their birthday. Very little needs to be said. The photo shows it to perfection.

I have come to the conclusion that it is without a doubt nature and definitely not nurture. After five years watching my twin girls grow up. We are born I believe to be whatever nature decides for us. We can’t change it. Our children will develop and grow into a skin that they are comfortable in.

The gender stereotyping debate over what society dictates that boys and girls should wear, like or what toys they should play with should be fought against with a passion. Otherwise if we are not careful we will have a generation of children that will conform to society’s restraints and that in turn will stop girls most importantly not striving and achieving whatever they want to be, but it will also stop boys believing that must grow up into a stereotypical macho male.

I think it would be very awesome if my twin girls became Prime Minister and the Chancellor of the Exchequer. Saying that the job being done at the moment I think they could do a better job now! After all most MP’s behave like children in the the Houses of Parliament. The girls would probably add maturity to the situation.

I am always disheartened by yet another example of gender stereotyping,with our children. At times it feels like one step forward, and two steps backwards. A change is happening, but it will take years. I for one will be pushing all the way for change, for my daughters to live in more equal world. To be whatever they want to be.

Would love to know your thoughts

3 Little Buttons

36 thoughts on “My Little Superhero and Princess 

  1. I agree with you. The only true way for change is to teach our kids none of that matters and for them to be who and what they want. My girls play superheros and fighting games and my son plays Barbie and makes jewelry. It’s about time the world sees this.

  2. I especially like your point about these restraints leading to girls not thinking that they can go out and achieve whatever they want. People who think that we already have equality have no further to look than the toy aisle. #thatfridaylinky

  3. It sure does take a long time for gender stereotyping to change. Posts like this help. Good on your girls for being themselves.
    #ThatFridayLinky

  4. Hi, what a fascinating read over nature verses nurture and gender stero typing. I come from a family with twins and although very similar there aspects which are completely different #ThatFridayLinky

  5. Anya enjoys playing with trains etc because she has always watched her older brother do it. She plays with dolls by herself or with friends but Matthew will never join in. I’m looking forward to seeing if Zach is more open to dolls etc as he sees both his older siblings. #ThatFridayLinky

  6. I think its great your girls are such individuals and have their own likes and also not fitting into rhay gendet stereotype but like what they like. They look a great little double act!! Happy birthday girls!! #thatfridaylinky

  7. Good on you for letting your daughters be who they want to be. Gender stereotyping is very frustrating, especially people looking down their noses at you as if you’re a mad man when all you want to do it support your children being happy.

    #ThatFridayLinky

  8. Well done for writing this Nige. Gender stereotyping is so annoying and shouldn’t still be the case, but sadly it all too often is.
    Great post and photos. #thatfridaylinky

  9. Happy birthday to your girls! I have two little girls who are very much like your two-one loves princesses and the other loves action heroes!
    P.S. Your house looks so tidy-I’m jealous!
    #thatfridaylinky

  10. My little one asked about boys wearing skirts the other day and of course I said the could. It’s our attitudes the hopefully push changes! I totally agree with you and love how the girls are so different! Thanks for hosting xx

  11. I bet it’s so interesting watching two children of the same age grow up together, yet be interested in such different things! 🙂 #ThatFridayLinky

    Helen x

  12. Yes, I’m with you. My girl is a big gamer and she loves things like Pokemon and Super Mario, but so many of the clothes are aimed at boys, not girls. She does have a selection of boys pyjamas and loves them.
    #ThatFridayLinky

  13. Ah they sound like fabulous, strong minded, individualistic little ladies. Must be so fascinating for you to watch them both grow in their own ways. I can imagine it’s been hard work at times but twins are just my kind of crazy dream. U would be in permanent awe lol

    #ThatFridayLinky

  14. I totally agree, I don’t even think there should be a section for boys and a section for girls. It should all be mixed together because who decided blue is for boys and pink is for girls? It’s crazy really. So glad your girls enjoyed their birthday celebrations anyway! #ThatFridayLinky

  15. Such gorgeous girls you must be very proud. And lovely that their own unique personalities can shine through. Also agree your girls could do a better job running the country 🙂 #thatfridaylinky

  16. Great post. It’s so infuriating that it’s just expected for boys to like boys things and girls to like girls things. My little boy is obsessed by all things Trolls at the moment yet we’ve received countless comments about them being girls toys! Why?! I’ve had to bite my tongue so many times. Posts like this help, nice work. #thatfridaylinky

  17. I love that your girls are so different in taste and do as they please. It’s a great trait to have and one that I am passionate about with my children. I’ve had a couple of instances with Reuben, one where we went into Greggs, he loves the cakes with the monster rings on top and he picked the yellow ring as yellow is his favourite colour. The staff member actually laughed and said oh that’s the princess, to which she received a glare from me and was told, no it’s yellow and it’s his favourite colour.
    The other time is when he decided he wanted to play with a doll and pushchair and was told he shouldn’t as it is ‘a girl’s toy’, I was quite firm with that person that he could play with whatever he wants.
    I hate that we still live in a world where this is for boys and this is for girls, hopefully as we keep pushing for a change our children will think nothing of it and it will have completely disappeared. #thatfridaylinky

  18. Some of our own family members said to me that I must be happy to have had a boy second time around to take the football so it shows what you’re up against where gender stereotyping is concerned when your own family pedal it. My girl loves dressing up as a princess and wearing pink sparkly clothes but she also loves going the match and playing football. My view is she can do what ever she likes and makes her happy #thatfridaylinky

  19. I think that you are lucky to have girls. It’s much easier for a girl to like “boy” things. A boy who likes “girl” things raises a lot more eyebrows. I always found that unfair. We’re always hearing about equal rights for women while boys are brainwashed into being a stereotype. #ThatFridayLinky

  20. I agree there is a huge gender gap STILL! It is unbelievable really considering the age we live in. I bought my little man an Anna doll for Christmas and a few of my relatives thought it was weird and asked me why Id done it! ‘… because he loves her!” I said… Boys need to grow to love babies and respect women as much as women need to learn to stand on their own too feet and be strong and independent; not 50’s housewives that just cook and clean. Times are a’ changin’ as a wise man once said 😉 #thatfridaylinky

  21. I love that the twins are such polar opposites but are so accepting of this and by passing the doll over shows that they’re so comfortable in their own skin yet happy to interact with those into different things! This is such a good trait to have and one I hope they keep as they get older! It sounds like they had an amazing birthday and were truely spoilt! #thatfridaylinky

  22. Another interesting post Nige. It’s a very interesting debate. I think they should maybe relabel the toys into heading of what they are about – i.e. ‘Action toys’ etc. Would help parents out without saying this is only for a certain gender.

  23. Love this! I have two very ‘girly’ girls if that is even a thing, but they still love playing with toys that are only found in the ‘boy’ section. Toys should be toys and children’s things shouldn’t be as strongly gender stereotyped as they are it is ridiculous. I think retailers try to make things easier for themselves by over masculinising (I know that isn’t really a word) the boys toys and making them overly aggressive, use dark colours and often with scary images, then they make girls things overly pink and glittery and all to do with dolls and little else. Why can’t they have more neutral things and use a bright range of colours?

  24. It is definitely nature that determines what a child likes, they are who they are! Sadly I think it will take years for manufacturers/retailers to change their attitudes. There’s a huge gap in the market there for someone to start making gender neutral superhero stuff! Looks like they had a great birthday, and a cake each…wow! #DreamTeam

  25. I must admit I am a tad in love with the batman outfit! My 6-year-old and I recently had a discussion about how he thinks it is unfair that I have more batman stuff than him. I have been gathering it for as long as I can remember! Good on you for not encouraging gender stereotyping. I am happy to encourage my boys to love whatever they want, even if it is a bright pink My Little Pony Toothbrush. #thatfridaylinky

  26. I totally agree with you. Nature is responsible all the way and we should be able to encourage that and not have to try and shape our little ones into conforming with stereotypes. My little girl has never been into dolls or princesses and would much prefer Paw Patrol and toy cars to anything that she would find on the “girls” aisle. Why should she? It’s lovely to see each of your girls expressing their personalities and indviduality. Thanks for sharing with #DreamTeam x

  27. Completely agree that people are too quick to judge on who things are bought for. My eldest wanted a baby so I ordered him one.. People looked at us strange but quickly turned away.. what are they judging for? They scared he will grow up to be, what? A loving father? a childcare professional? deary me.. people need a kick up the backside sometimes! #thatfridaylinky

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